May 2012-A Time to Drop “If” “Maybe” and “When”

The theme for May 2012 is commitment…but it’s probably not what you’re thinking…

Commitment is removing the back door, the escape route and the words “if”, “maybe” and “when” from your vocabulary. Commitment is moving into your future with no turning back and no escape hatch. Commitment is eliminating the worry and anxiety that comes with ambivalence, doubt, consideration and “too much thinking”. Commitment is a natural segway of any bid for power. A bid for power without a proper commitment to launch it is not a serious bid for power.

If your bid for power is to stop smoking, you can’t qualify it with “if I find the right program” or “when I get more of a handle on my life” or “maybe next week”. No, if you want to stop smoking you stop right now. You make a commitment that goes along with your bid for power. Once you commit 100 percent, then the program or other support will show up and you will begin to get a handle on your life.

It is the same thing for relationships or work or health. If your bid for power is to make a change in the direction that is better for you, then do it now without procrastination and without the ability to sneak out if it does not work. Most of the reason for something not working out is your lack of true commitment to it. All of you have made some bid for power last month whether you are aware of it or not. This is the month where you either commit to it or choose a new one that you can commit to.

There are two types of Commitment: Commitment that is unconscious and manifested by your actions rather than what you verbally intend.  And commitment that is consciously and deliberately planned for and chosen. The unconscious commitment is the one you may not be aware of but everyone else is by your actions around it.

A good example is someone who complains and complains about the nature of their relationship because it is not a good fit, and says they want something else, but ends up staying in the same relationship “until something better comes along”. This is not a serious bid for power for a new relationship and certainly not the way spirit works. This example is showing an action that the universe reads as a commitment and therefore will not provide another “better relationship” to take its place while the action shows a commitment to the current one. So this person may think they are bidding to change their circumstance but as long as they stay in the current relationship they are not serious about the change. If you are truly committed to changing your relationship dynamics you must show you are serious by becoming conscious about the ways you are showing commitment to the things you say you do not want.

Another example may be the person who says, I am on a diet, I intend to lose weight and really should not eat this piece of cake and then proceeds to eat it anyway. Are they serious about their bid for power to lose weight? Where is the commitment? Another example is the bid for power to have more fun and make more time for self. However if the person continues adding things that are not fun to their plate, they are showing by their actions that they are not truly committed to their intention and guess what, spirit will always give you more of what you are putting your energy into. This person may likely say, “I will make time when things slow down.” This is not good enough for spirit, as it is a conditional commitment and shows through action that the real commitment is something different than the spoken intention.

True commitment is unconditional, something we are not used to having or working with. Conditions create the “ifs”, “whens”, and “maybes” in our vocabulary. Placing conditions on your bid for power waters down the commitment to it and is like putting only your big toe in the water when you really intended to take a swim. Hesitancy, doubt, confusion, ambivalence, worry, anxiety, fear and mistrust, all take their toll on your ability to commit to something cleanly and clearly.

There are other ways that unconscious commitment manifests itself. If you get pregnant and decide you are keeping the child, you are committing to the relationship of being a parent. How many parents have there been that have never really consciously committed to this huge bid for power? And how many interesting and karmic issues are being dealt with and untangled because of it.

We could also say that just by being born you have committed to being on this planet, which is in itself a bid for power. Many of you out there are still a bit ambivalent about that one, and until you truly commit to being here, spirit will not support you in the most powerful way. You could say it was not your choice to be here, your parents decided it for you and so on… That is giving your power away and allowing Martyrdom to rule. The Martyrdom we have plaguing us this year is actually providing us with an opportunity to eliminate the inner victim by taking responsibility for our lives and our bids for power, and committing to what we want through our actions as adults. We also need to stop blaming others for things that don’t work out.

Look at your life and see if you can identify the commitments you find yourself in due to either taking action or not taking action. If you can’t in good conscience choose them as conscious commitments you have work to do. It is OK to eliminate or change the bids for power they represent as long as you communicate this clearly and are 100 percent committed to your withdrawing. If however you identify a commitment you were unconscious about but really want to keep then consciously commit to it 100 percent and you will see a big difference in how spirit begins to support your decision and that bid for power. Remember you do not have to know all the details of how things will manifest or what steps will show up. Your commitment is enough.

Communication is a big issue and the lack of it tends to keep things very messy especially in relationships. If you are in any relationship where you know there are assumptions from the other person that you are not willing to agree or commit to, but they remain unspoken, it is time to bring them to the surface and tell the truth. It is usually fear of being alone or disappointing the other that keeps this messy unspoken situation going on for far too long. This is the month of growing up and becoming an adult, telling the truth and taking your bids for power very seriously. Relationships are the point of growth for most people, be it relationship with self, with a partner, family member, or work colleague, therefore most bids for power and most commitments will involve at least one relationship. Don’t be afraid to communicate your bid for power and your commitment. If you are secretive and unwilling to share, it means you have doubts. If you have doubts you are not 100 percent committed. Either work those doubts out and commit, or make a change or adjustment to your bid.

People have different styles of communication. Depending on your style, you may have an easier or a more difficult time. Those who have the intellectual trap may find it more difficult to commit without conditions and reservations. Those who are emotionally centered have an easier time with the emotional clarity that true bids for power need to be authentic. Whatever your style, communication should be addressed this month as a way to clean up messy commitments.

Consciously chosen commitments are different in that they follow consciously chosen bids for power and are thought about and planned for. If your bid for power is about getting a better job or a bigger house then your commitment would be to do whatever it takes to accomplish that. You commit to leaving your current position or home in order to move into a better situation. You don’t say ” I will move if and when and maybe”, you decide for certain that you will be making the change and then give the timing over to spirit. Giving timing over to spirit is not being ambivalent it is simply being flexible while still being 100% committed to the end result.

We have many rituals that provide structures for conscious commitment. Marriage, many kinds of contracts from loans to jobs, putting things in writing, study courses and diplomas, initiations into religions, etc. If you enter into a commitment of this kind through one of these rituals, take it seriously and enter into it for yourself, not for someone else. If you find yourself needing to break the commitment for any reason (divorce, bankruptcy, foreclosure, repossession, layoff or quitting a job, dropping out of a program) do it consciously and take full responsibility. Do a ritual around the closure and the ending. If you don’t, you will leave many loose ends that continue to bleed your energy and get in the way for a new bid for power and a new commitment.

With a conscious commitment it is also imperative to be consistent. Be certain and unconditional and communicate that to others. Others will only try and talk you out of a commitment if they feel there is an opening of doubt, confusion, uncertainty, fear or numerous conditions attached to your bid. Spirit recognizes the certainty behind your bid for power through the commitment behind it. Make sure your commitment is also possible for you physically. It is not advisable to commit to 5 hours per day at the gym in order to lose weight and get into shape when you have a full time job and other commitments and don’t have 5 hours per day to spare. So be reasonable and take baby steps if you have to. Don’t set yourself up for failure so you can be a martyr about it. Be practical, be certain, be committed.

What are the fears that keep people from committing to what they really want?

Fear of success or fear of failure.

People usually fall into one of these two categories and it is one of the reasons behind procrastination. If you are successful then you can no longer hide behind the identity of someone who can’t get it together and needs help and care from others. You may actually have to be responsible for yourself, your success and have no more excuses for not living your life to the fullest. If you are one of these people, you may have some residual fears from other lifetimes in which perhaps you abused the power that came with success, or you lost it all or you became a person greatly resented because of it.

The fear of failure can also show up as procrastination but it has its roots in self–deprecation, lack of confidence and low self esteem. These people have trouble even getting their thoughts around what they want off the ground. They are always looking to others for permission. If you are one of these people it is best for you to start with baby steps, small bids for power that you can commit to, and to stop comparing yourself to others.

Fear of entrapment and losing ones freedom.

These fears are usually connected with those that have greed and are terrified that they will miss out on something better if they commit to what is in front of them. These people are constantly searching and never satisfied. Self-destruction also plays into these fears as the illusion of ultimate freedom. Bids for power with these obstacles running the show are based on a false sense of power and mostly reactive rather than proactive. Any commitment possible behind these bids is tarnished by the ego and false personality and usually unsuccessful in the long run as it is not based in truth. If you are one of these people it is important that your bid for power and commitment has to do with something that truly has value for you internally and emotionally, and gives meaning to your life. Look to your relationships and to that which supports you unconditionally.

Fear of losing control.

This fear is mostly based on stubbornness and the fear of change. This especially comes up for people who find themselves swept up in someone else’s bid for power where they end up as the focus for the commitment. For example if a boss makes a bid for power for the business that requires everyone to make a change and you value your job, you have a choice; get with the program or leave. If you choose to stay, do it consciously and bid for the change and commit to it. If you don’t, your resentment and denial will limit you to the opportunities to grow and expand in the new configuration. If you are one of these people, always consciously choose what is already in front of you. That way it becomes your conscious commitment and bid for power.

The opportunities this month:

Commitment, certainty, clarity, expansion, abundance, movement, manifestation, direction, support, insight and fulfillment.

The above is an excerpt from the monthly forecast.  The author of this commentary, Lena Stevens, is the co-founder of an international school and consulting firm dedicated to the study and application of shamanism and wisdom.  Lena Stevens has co-authored books with Jose Stevens, Ph.D., such as Secrets of Shamanism:Tapping the Spirit Power Within You and has written extensively about tips to increase personal energy.

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